Helping Kids Deal with Perfectionism While Reading

Perfectionism is a challenge that many students face, and not only does it take the enjoyment out of learning to read, but it can severely block a student’s progress. Take a look at some effective strategies for helping kids deal with perfectionism while learning how to read.

Students can face many challenges while learning how to read, but perfectionism is often overlooked. A student’s perfectionist tendencies can be frustrating for parents and teachers, but it is even more frustrating for the student. These students often develop a fear of failure that creates anxiety and prevents them from experiencing the joys of reading. But there are strategies that can help students, teachers, and parents overcome this challenge. Keep reading to discover our 10 best tips for helping kids deal with perfectionism while learning how to read.

1. Normalize Mistakes

   It is important for students to know that making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process. When students are afraid to make mistakes, they hold themselves back from trying new things. Explain to your student that mistakes provide valuable opportunities for growth and improvement. You can also try sharing stories about how even adults make errors while reading or learning new things.

2. Praise Effort, Not Perfection

   A great way to help students overcome perfectionism is by not focusing solely on perfect pronunciation and fluency. Instead, praise your student for putting in the effort, sounding out words, or trying to read independently. This helps encourage a mindset shift that will benefit them not just in the journey to reading fluency, but in many aspects of life.

   

3. Set Realistic Goals

   It’s good to set goals for your student, but they need to be realistic. Set achievable reading goals that are tailored to their level, and break down larger goals into smaller, manageable steps to avoid overwhelming your student.

4. Encourage a Growth Mindset

   Another mentality shift that will help your student inside and outside of the classroom is adopting a growth mindset. Make sure your student understands that their abilities are not fixed and that they can be improved with practice and perseverance. Instead of saying “I can’t read,” teach them to say “I can’t read YET, but I’m learning.”

5. Model Positive Attitudes

   Students learn from the behavior of the adults around them, so strive to be a good role model for your student. Try to demonstrate the benefits of having a positive attitude toward challenges and trying new things, and share stories of how you overcame struggles by handling them with optimism and determination.

   

6. Make Reading Fun

   Being a perfectionist can make it hard to have fun while reading. If you can make reading fun, kids won’t take it — or themselves — so seriously. Try incorporating playful and enjoyable reading activities into your student’s routine, such as using funny voices, acting out dialogue, playing reading and literacy games, and choosing books or magazines that align with their interests.

   Here are a few reading and spelling games we love:

   • Bananagrams – How quickly can you take a handful of letters and create an intersecting grid of words?
   • Boggle – Time is ticking—can you find all the words hidden in the grid?
   • Apples to Apples Junior – This fast-paced card game is not only a ton of fun, it’s also a wonderful way to expand vocabulary!
   • Pickles to Penguins! – This quick-thinking, picture-linking party game helps strenghten language skills.

7. Read Together

   Reading together is a great way to model positive learning habits. Take turns reading aloud, and try sounding out difficult words or even making the occasional mistake. This can create a supportive reading environment where your student won’t feel as much pressure to be perfect.

8. Limit Pressure and Competition

   Speaking of pressure, it’s very important to avoid comparing your student’s reading level with others or setting unrealistic expectations. Of course, many students are competitive, and it can be difficult to get them to stop measuring their ability against that of their peers. Be sure to focus on their individual growth and always celebrate their achievements, no matter how small.

   

9. Provide Emotional Support

   Perfectionism is a very real challenge, and it usually isn’t enough to simply tell your student not to worry so much. Don’t forget to be empathetic and understanding of your student’s feelings of frustration or disappointment. Offer encouragement and reminders that learning to read takes time and there’s no need to master it right away.

10. Seek Professional Help If Necessary

    Perfectionism is a real challenge that can have strong negative effects both on students and adults. If you think your student’s perfectionism is significantly affecting their mental health and happiness, consider seeking support from a counselor or therapist. There are plenty of talented, qualified experts that have experience helping kids overcome perfectionism, and getting help earlier rather than later can make a big difference.

Pushing past perfectionism can be a long journey, but hopefully some of these tips will help get your student on a path toward healthy learning. Reading can be so enlightening, therapeutic, and enjoyable, and it’s a real shame for anyone to miss out on those benefits due to a fear of failure.

Let us know if any of our tips on helping kids deal with perfectionism worked for you and your student, and don’t hesitate to share any advice or techniques of your own!